Losing your virginity is pretty simple for boys, all they really have to do is aim. But for girls, it’s a little more complicated. While losing your virginity shouldn’t be taken too lightly, it isn’t something to be ashamed of, it’s something that should be celebrated!
If you are considering cashing in the V-Card, and don’t know what to expect, here are a couple of tips and tricks to guide you.
What Does Losing Your Virginity Mean
Going all the way is unique to everyone. While everyone has their own definition of what virginity is, losing it is accomplished the first time you have sex.
For women, losing your virginity usually means voting your hymen off the island. The hymen is a thin, fleshy tissue that’s located at the opening of your vagina. When you go all the way, the hymen is sometimes torn or stretched, which might cause some discomfort.
You may experience some light bleeding if your hymen is stretched during penetration, this is completely normal. Typically, this won’t produce enough blood to leave a mess on the sheets.
What Does Losing Your Virginity Feel Like
A few people have pleasant memories of the first time they “made love”, but most people have embarrassing, awkward, painful and uncomfortable recollections of losing their virginity (don’t worry, these make much better stories).
Losing your virginity is most likely not going to be perfect and pain-free like rom-coms would like you to believe.
The truth is that it might hurt, and you will probably be awkwardly humping away wondering if that’s what it’s always going to feel like – but there is light at the end of the tunnel because sex gets better with age and experience!
Most boys have no clue how to please women in their teenage years (some men never truly learn), but some of them will take the time to understand what makes you feel more pleasure instead of pain.
Tips And Tricks For Losing Your Virginity
When the time comes, try to think of it as gaining an experience, instead of losing or giving something away.
Whether you are a virgin or not, make sure that when you have sex, you and your partner are both ready and that you actually want to. You don’t need to rush into it! So, get comfortable with one another, and the experience will be a lot more pleasurable and a lot less awkward.
You’re more likely to feel pleasure if you are comfortable with your body, your partner and the experience as a whole. Don’t put too much pressure on the moment, there’s no such thing as the perfect first time. Don’t be afraid to laugh off mistakes and have fun.
If at any point you stop having fun, or you change your mind and decide you actually don’t want to have sex, then say so. No means no, your partner has no right to try to force you into sex. Remember this doesn’t just apply to your first time, it’s your right – every time!
To escape the pain of popping your cherry, make sure you are properly aroused and lubricated, the wetter the better. So, don’t skip foreplay and go straight from kissing to doing the deed. Giving your body time to prepare is crucial to minimising the friction which causes discomfort and tearing.
If one sexual position hurts, try another! The best sex positions for losing your virginity are the simplest ones like missionary and cowgirl.
Find a safe, private spot so you don’t have anyone barging in – you REALLY don’t want siblings, parents or roommates walking in while you’re bumping uglies.
Want to have an orgasm? Don’t expect your bae to get you there the first time (or the second!) in order for you to climax – you need to know your own body, exactly what feels good and what doesn’t. Your partner won’t be able to read your mind, so give them some guidance and teach them how and where to touch you.
How To Stay Clean While “Doing The Dirty”
Now that you’re thinking of bumping uglies, make sure that you understand this means you have to wear protection, not only to prevent an unwanted pregnancy, but also to prevent STDs. The best way to do this is by using a condom and contraception.
To learn more about sex, check out our blog on 6 Things Sex Ed Forgot To Teach You.