Bed is not Just for Sleeping


Sex is one of the strong bonds of a healthy relationship. It helps us build intimacy and discover sides and qualities of our partner that we would have a hard time discovering otherwise. That’s why we pay so much attention to it, because besides pure pleasure, it brings us self-confidence and closeness, as well as a sense of a fulfilling relationship. Busy daily lives and other extraneous factors often play a role in partners’ sex lives, and they seem to lose interest in each other in bed. This brings with it negative consequences such as insecurity, having hang-ups and even cheating.

The good thing is that sex issues can always be worked on, provided that a proper high level of communication is built between the couple and there are no taboo topics. To maintain an optimal relationship, mixed with passion, efforts must be taken on both sides. The reasons for the low sex drive or the momentary inability to initiate and participate in sexual intercourse can be due to a variety of things. Here are five factors that I believe cause the sexual flame to go out:

1.   Chronic fatigue

Due to the tight schedule at work and multiple tasks, we sometimes have no strength left for feats in bed. A hot shower or dinner with our loved one at the end of the working day is enough to fill us with enough positive emotions. Of course, our partner may feel exactly the same way, and may need a lot more sexual attention. In the first place, it is good, communicating with each other, to identify the issue together. Even if both of you have found your comfort zone in all this routine, neglecting your sex life will give an unpleasant impact on your relationship in the long run. If you feel yourself getting cold feet in bed, it might be time to make a plan of action. Set aside one night a week to spend more time intimately. Give each other a relaxing massage, watch an erotic movie, or take that hot shower I mentioned above together. Create a box of sexual challenges and download one each week. Go to a bar just the two of you, wearing your nicest clothes and accessories, because diligence attracts. This is how you’ll have a more debauched night and you’ll be able to shake off even a little bit of your everyday life.

2. Stress > Sex

The body is a subaltern of the mind, and when it is filled with anxieties, it affects physical performance. If you feel concerned, you are unlikely to be able to relax completely in bed and enjoy sex. In some cases, it is difficult to shake off the stress, but we can still try a few tackles. Personally, I find walking quite calming. Even if the walk consists of walking home from work or shopping at the neighborhood store, the time spent outside manages to distract us somewhat. Another tried and tested method of balancing emotions is yoga. Meditating at home impacts unwanted stress and frees your mind.

3. Alcohol

We’ve all heard the phrase, “Drunk people, happy bed”. In fact, the use of alcohol in larger quantities and other active substances can interfere with erection and ejaculation, as well as lead to mood and libido disorders. If the partner is not aware of these effects, they may interpret the lack of sexual desire and power differently, so here again the key is communication.

4. Children

Children are the greatest happiness, but in fact they require constant care. Many couples find it difficult to adapt to the arrival of a new member in the family and their sex life most often suffers from this. In their efforts trying to give them enough time and attention, parents put sex on the back burner. So at every opportunity you should indulge in each other, which will make things far more exciting.

5. Boredom

You’ve got tired of it. You’ve been together for such a long time, you’ve done so much together and it’s like you’re bored of everything. This should not be taken as the end of a passionate period in a relationship, but rather as a challenge. There is always something new to try if you take efforts. Try looking at yourself with different eyes, with the eyes of strangers or people you’ve just met who have strong chemistry with each other. Remember that when you are intimate, you are closer than ever and there is no room for shame and prejudice. So don’t be afraid to try unfamiliar and exciting things.

Well, why not have sex if you can?